Airbnb Support: Kafka Meets 2001’s HAL 9000

Fictitious conversation between two Airbnb upper management staff. Disclaimer: This conversation has no relationship to anyone or any company, living or dead.

UM Staff 1: Hey, I’ve got a great idea for saving money!

UMS 2: Yeah?

UMS 1: We just set up a support team that basically blocks customers from causing us hassle and money.

UMS 2: Ok… but won’t there be problems?

UMS 1: No, no… you see, we keep the customer absolutely powerless. Sure they will get frustrated and suicidal and their finances will go down the toilet, but they will have no way to get past the wall that we set up, so they will never be heard. That way we can keep the commission low on the vast majority of hosts, the vast minority will sing our praises, and the minority who complain will be drowned out. Even if the customer threatens legal proceedings we can cover it from the vast amount of money we are raking in. The complaining customer will never be able to compete.

UMS 2: Hmm, sounds a little risky.

UMS 1: No, see I’ve read Kafka; you just basically gaslight the single customer, suggest their reality (fairness, morality, responsibility) is completely wrong. As for the people who have to actually interface with the… ‘customer’ we set up the HAL scenario.

UMS 2: What’s that?

UMS 1: Well just get the support staff to repeat ‘Siri-like’ computer generated phrases like “we have a team working on it 24/7” and use passive statements like “it has been reported to a team (that I cannot tell you the name of).”

UMS 2: Beautiful. Let’s do it!

I was delisted on June 3rd (wrongly). I can’t enter the details of my license (first attempt June 11th) into their network (computer error they say). I have been given the runaround ever since, with the last ‘senior customer service staff’ member being the least helpful. No surprise there. I am exhausted, beyond frustrated, angry, and depressed.

Checkout Hour Drama, Trying to Pull Something?

I booked a couple with no reviews. I have booked folks with no reviews before and usually everything goes very well. After they showed up at 12:30 AM to check in (I do not have 24-hour check in), the woman mentioned to her partner that the place looked too nice, almost like it would have been a problem running something by me because the place wasn’t a dump. I stood there and observed carefully their interaction as they arrived.

The gentleman then left at 1:00 AM and returned at 10:00 AM the next day to slam the door as hard as a human being can slam a door. I gulped. I sat there saying to myself, “you wanted to be a host, here you go…”

They then hibernated in the room after that; they hardly went to the bathroom or out for food. Another thing that was odd since people dont come to New York City to hibernate for two days. They went to their alleged wedding and showed up at 5:00 AM. Checkout is at 11:00 AM.

At one hour before checkout, the guy said: “Hi there. Can I talk to you? Is it okay if we stay here untill our flight leaves? We would have to sleep in the airport and don’t really know when the flight leaves. We still haven’t seen the city at all and would love to go to the Statue of Liberty.”

Mind you it was one hour before checkout. I said, “Well, you can stay until 3:00 PM.” Then the little voice in my head said, “You do know if you let them stay past their checkout time without a paid reservation you will probably need the police to get them out of your house?”

I knocked on their door again and said, “I just spoke to Airbnb and they told me I would have legal problems if I allow you to be here past the checkout time since another guest is coming in.” I knew there was no guest coming that evening, but I wanted to be polite and very firm.

Then he said, “But you are the host. I thought I would come talk to you instead of going through the site.”

“You didn’t come to me to make a reservation. You used Airbnb to contact me and book for you. We don’t have anything else to talk about; everything has to go through Airbnb.”

The woman inside the room farted. They placed a call to someone and said, “My wife is nervous about this.” My walls are paper thin and I can hear air as it moves. I was now in the kitchen and they were leaving. He dropped his suitcase, nervous as can be. I shook their hands and said, “I totally apologize for not being able to help you stay past checkout, but it’s hard to do that between reservations.”

They left, and the door closed behind them. I wonder if telling the next hosts these scam artists are worth dealing with. I have no idea what type of a review they might leave me, but in all honestly, I trully dont care. He never looked me in the face as he asked me if they could stay past checkout.

Innkeeper Finds Faults with the Review Process

We own a beautiful inn in Britsih Columbia, Canada that is rated five stars across all the board and is also a winner of awards. We placed our inn on Airbnb to attract millennials to our island and show them nature and the wonders of a protected environment. We have been on Airbnb for three years.

We had an emergency and had to cancel one reservation which the guest took very well and very kindly. This was our first cancellation on Airbnb. The next thing we know, we saw that the guest’s review had been posted on the page like a ‘wall of shame’. Shame on Airbnb. This is disgusting.

We will be removing our inn from Airbnb as we are appalled. We also use Expedia and Booking.com – professional, supportive organizations. I do understand this process for hosts that constantly cancel but not Superhosts with one cancellation in three years and excellent reviews. Airbnb should remember that they don’t catch flies with vinegar. They have too much money and swollen heads.

Thought I was Protected by the Airbnb Guarantee…

I’m a seasoned host on both Airbnb and HomeAway/VRBO. I have never any real issues with guests until my experience in May. Little did I know a band was staying in my home after some show gigs in the Raleigh NC area. There was everything from cannabis left in potted plants to cigarette butts, empty beer cans in the yard, etc. I was not happy with the findings but thought my $300 dollar security deposit would easily cover the damages and excess cleaning charges. Four weeks later and I am still waiting on compensation for my damage claim. This was my first claim involving an Airbnb guest and I am now aware the Airbnb site provides little protection for a host. My customer service experience with Homeaway/VRBO has never been this poorly executed. I was told my claim/concern has been escalated and that was three weeks ago. I have been calling every week and the Airbnb agent just verifies ‘someone’ is working on it. Long story short, I am no longer hosting on Airbnb. Anyone considering hosting on Airbnb: don’t blindly think you will actually get paid out of the security deposit you post. You have no control over it.

Account Cancelled After Guest Makes False Claims

I have been an Airbnb Host for about five years. My reviews were mostly five stars. Even when they were less they were always good to outstanding reviews. I made Superhost twice. About two months ago I was warned that my listing was not conforming to discrimination rules. I was not permitted to limit single women to a maximum of three nights (or lose my girlfriend). I was not permitted to limit people who were heavily medicated or using drugs. I was not permitted to state that my place was not a good fit for handicapped people. I fixed all that and then they reactivated my listing. I was also warned that if I had one more violation that I would be barred from using Airbnb and never be able to reactivate or list again. I booked several guest and had five-star reviews from all in the next two months.

Then I booked three guests, two of which I had booked at an earlier date for three or four nights and had given them a very good review, stating they were trustworthy and clean. The three guests were booked for four nights. They did smoke (often in their car). They tried to hook up the living room TV with the HDMI for a PlayStation. Before I went out for the evening I noted that they left the TV on with unknown source. I turned it off for them and went out for the evening. The next morning the TV was in internet mode. The guest had tried to pull the TV off the wall which is not possible because of the custom mounting. The cables for the sound bar and TV were in wrong places. Of course the TV and sound bar would not work. I could not find the controllers and so pulled the power plug to turn it off until I could get help to remove the TV, check it out, and cable it properly and then do the required setups. After two hours it was working fine.

The guests violated house rules by not closing their window and turning off their intake fan in the daytime. They could have been violating the no-smoking house rule. On the third day I was out and about most of the day and returned to find the house unlocked. A short while later, the guest returned and parked in my neighbor’s parking space. I called them to move the car. I was then confronted with one of the guests. He said that my place was full of rodents and insects. I said that was impossible unless they brought them.

He then screamed racial slurs at me. I asked them to leave and he stated that they were on the way out. I called the police who arrived shortly after they left. The officer and I checked the room for rodents. There was something on the sink and a few leaves and sticky spots on the floor. Nothing had been stolen. I noticed that a computer desk caster was broken and called the next day to make a claim.

Airbnb told me that the guest had submitted images of rodents and insects everywhere. I wanted to see the pictures since I said they had to be planted by the guests. I lived here since 2004 and my sister was here ten years before that. There was never a single mouse. Insects were not welcome and well under control. I noted that several extra washcloths were used. Probably to catch all the mice and remove them from the house. They were all gone.

I purchased glue traps and other traps to make sure since I had a guest coming in two days. That guest was an Airbnb host. I told her about the three guests and the rodent pictures. She had never placed a claim with Airbnb. I tried to place a claim and had pictures taken of the broken desk; they kept up a non-response procedure.

They refunded one day’s stay to the guest. I questioned that and then the fee was restored since the first Airbnb person had not consulted with me. A second Airbnb person had overruled the first since they had not followed Airbnb procedures. Then the broken desk claim still needed to be processed. That became impossible, since about five days after the guest left, my account was cancelled.

I was able to book one guest on another site. He emailed me to say his stay had been cancelled. I had not recorded the contact information of the other guests – my mistake. At one time in the past Airbnb had cancelled one of my guest for some issue. When he showed up, he wanted his money back and called his friend for help. The friend burst out laughing.

However, if I had not been home, that guest who had the keypad code could have been in my house. Then what? My general feeling with Airbnb over the years is that they tend to keep changing their rules. Sometimes, I feel that they tend to be very nasty. I have listed my place on VBRO and had my first booking within five days. It seems like most of the places are higher priced. Not so with Airbnb.

Generally, hosts should not expect too much from Airbnb if you ever have to file a claim. Airbnb prevents you from writing a bad review for a guest when your account is cancelled. The fraudulent guest at my place had three okay reviews and one was from me. Any guest can do the same fraud or similar schemes. They do it against many companies. It’s a lot to consider if you host. I think the best thing is to raise your prices high enough for any strangers that you are willing to host. Don’t expect Airbnb, who got too big too fast, to really care about losing you as a host.

Airbnb Benefits Greatly from Exchange Rates

We are Canadian citizens with a timeshare in the United states. We listed the unit on April 18th in US dollars yet when we were paid, we were paid a 1 to 1 ratio, Canadian to US dollars. At that time the exchange rate was about $.77 to $1.00. That meant Airbnb kept approximately $0.20/dollar collected from our renters. I do not know if this is standard practice for other countries with a different currency value than the US, but I believe this is an unethical practice. I now know why Airbnb refused to deposit our funds into our US account in our Canadian institution. I would appreciate any suggestions about how to avoid this from occurring again. Yes, I have contacted Airbnb directly with no response. They also withheld taxes even though all the required tax forms were submitted prior to the rental.

Airbnb Needs to Work on its Occupancy Taxes

Well, After talking to five customer service people, going downtown to Airbnb’s Portland office, and getting turned away, I have just about had it. I had a reservation to start a guest rental from July 1st to July 31st. Airbnb charged her an occupancy tax of $223. The city law here is anything “fewer than 30 days” is classified as a temporary rentals, not 30 days or less. That’s one error.

To figure a new solution, we tried to add a day so we were in the 31-night category. That added over a thousand dollars for the extra night. We could not get any help from customer service. In fact, we got five or five different suggestions, which began with canceling and starting over; this would have penalties.

It seems to me Airbnb is great at wanting the business but poor at actually wanting to fix the problems. Finally a lady got back to me from the Portland office and we figured out why we could not add a day. I had listed two days before and after reservations for cleaning. If a guest needs to stay longer Airbnb’s software should have pushed the cleaning days out. I am going to look for new alternatives to Airbnb. They can afford luxury offices but can’t help fix something with what should have been done with a single phone call.

Airbnb is a Total Sham when it comes to Damages

I had a reservation which Airbnb failed to collect payment on and still allowed these guests to check into my place. I called and sent a message to Airbnb. I was told numerous times that everything was okay and that I should not eject these people.

On the second day of the stay, I discovered that my books had been torn and thrown all over the the apartment. Food and drinks had been spilled everywhere and the apartment was filled with the smell of poop and urine. I had no choice but to remove them to prevent them from further damaging my place. Feeling bad for her and her two small children, I paid for a hotel night for them.

I came back to the apartment to find that she had allowed her mentally handicapped child to poop and pee on my carpet, and bed. It took my cleaning crew of two people six hours at $25 an hour to clean the apartment. Stanley Steamer came in the next day and charged me $169 after I could not get that smell out of my carpet with my home steamer. My books can not be replaced as they were my culinary school books. The bed, which was purchased in February when we had an interior designer design the apartment for us, had to be hauled away because the smell was so bad.

I submitted a claim for $1500 for replacement of the bed, and absorbed all the other costs as I plan to write it off as the cost of business on my taxes. After two weeks of back and forth – submitting pictures, quotes, etc. – Airbnb responded with “Congratulations! We have approved the coverage of your damages: $183”

What a joke. Their statement for that was that the damages did not affect the functionality of the mattress. Are you freaking kidding me? My apartment cost us $90,000 to complete because we will have my mother-in-law eventually coming to live with us. I thought in the meantime we would use Airbnb. People are paying $100 a night for my apartment, and Airbnb doesn’t think that the smell of poop and urine affects the functionality of the mattress. What a bunch of idiots. Who is going to pay $100 a night to sleep on a bed that smells like that? What kind of reviews do you think I am going to get and how will that affect my listing?

The bottom line is Airbnb doesn’t give a rat’s ass about damages to their hosts’ property. After I complete my current booking with Airbnb I will be taking my listing elsewhere.

Airbnb Employees were my Worst Guests

My bosses owned a five-bedroom house in San Francisco that was soon to be vacant so we came to an agreement that I would live there for free and host on Airbnb, and they would keep the money as rent. They stood to make a couple thousand more a month than if they just rented it out long term.

Everything was going great and I was bringing in on average $12,000/month. For the most part, I screened my guests and they were all great. I had a request from an Airbnb employee in Portland to book all my extra rooms as she and her coworkers had to come to San Francisco for a conference. I figured they were Airbnb employees so they wouldn’t do anything crazy; I booked the stay.

I let the contact person know that the day they were to arrive I would actually be in Napa Valley checking on some properties up there for my bosses, but I would be back the next day. It clearly stated that this was a shared house and that I, the host, live onsite. I arrived at the house in the afternoon of their second day and met the group of girls staying. We chatted a bit as they were getting ready for dinner and I said I was just dropping off my bags and then heading out to meet my friend for a drink. After a couple drinks and catching up with my firmed I returned home and went to bed. The group was still out to dinner.

At 3:00 AM I was woken up by a guy and two girls demanding that I leave. They said they rented the entire house, I was not supposed to be there, and I had to get out. I was disoriented after being woken up from a sound sleep and a bit confused. When I realized what was going on I told them that it clearly states on my listing that I as the host live on site. The kept demanding that I leave immediately. I told them I wasn’t going anywhere. They wouldn’t leave me alone. After arguing for what seemed like an hour, they finally left my room.

The next day when I woke up they were all gone and left with three nights still on their booking. I called Airbnb, explained what had happened, and told them that if they requested a refund that I would not allow it. I also requested that someone from the Portland office call me to discuss their employee’s behavior. The supervisor called back and assured me that these employees would be dealt with.